My daughter used to walk with her back against the wall.
Not because she was shy. Not because the hallway was crowded.
Because she didn’t want to mess up my vacuum lines.
I didn’t see it at the time for what it was. I thought I was just someone who had high standards. Someone who took pride in her home. Someone who did things right.
It took me years — and a lump in my throat every time I think about it — to call it what it actually was.
Perfectionism. And it cost me more than a clean carpet.
Real Talk: Perfectionism Isn’t a Strength. It’s a Strategy for Staying Safe.
Here’s the hard truth about perfectionism.
It’s never about the “thing” you’re perfecting. It’s about control. And underneath control? Well, that’s – fear.
I was good at the things I practiced. The vacuum lines. The hospital corners from my army cadet days. The alphabetized soup cans. The fridge stocked and rotated like a grocery store.
I was excellent at those things.
And I avoided — with Olympic-level skill — the things I wasn’t good at yet.
In business, that meant strategy and marketing got all of me. Because I was confident there.
But bookkeeping? Avoided it. Books made me anxious because I didn’t feel competent. So I’d do everything else first. And the books would sit there, staring at me.
Sales? Avoided it even harder. Because what if they said no? What if I wasn’t good enough?
So instead, I’d spend hours perfecting things customers never saw. Tweaking a proposal. Re-reading my website. Fussing over design.
I spent a lot of time and energy – almost ready.
The Hidden Cost We Need To Talk About
Here’s what “almost ready” actually costs you.
It’s not just time. It’s the customers you never got in front of. The contracts you never signed. The relationships you never started.
I’ve laid awake at night running through my to-do list like a broken record. The things I didn’t finish. The calls I didn’t make. The proposals I didn’t send because they weren’t quite right yet.
That guilt? It’s heavy. And it compounds.
The more I chased perfect, the more I delayed the only thing that actually moved the needle — getting in front of real people.
The Shift That Changed Everything
Over time — and a lot of missed opportunities — I learned the secret.
The secret isn’t doing things perfectly. It’s questioning why you’re doing them at all.
Ask yourself: Who is this for?
If the answer isn’t “a customer” or “a prospect” or “someone who needs what I offer” — you might be hiding. And I say that with the warmest possible hug, because I hid for years.
I had to redefine what “good enough” meant. I had to learn to be perfect about showing up and more relaxed about results.
That wasn’t lowering the bar. It was finally pointing the bar in the right direction.
What I Learned From Getting It Wrong (Twice)
I’ve burned out twice in my 25 year career.
And both times, perfectionism had it’s hand in it. Because perfectionism is exhausting. It’s a standard that moves every time you get close.
So here’s what I’ve learned on the other side:
Done beats perfect every time. Not because quality doesn’t matter. It does. But a 90% proposal in front of a client beats a 100% proposal sitting in your drafts folder.
Grace is a business strategy. Every time I did something wrong, I had two choices — spiral or learn. The spiral cost me days. The learning cost me nothing.
Customers give you the data perfectionism never will. When I started showing up — making the calls, sending the emails, booking the discovery sessions — the guesswork stopped. Real people told me what worked. In real time. No amount of polish behind closed doors gives you that.
The Carpet Lines Were Never About the Carpet
When I picture my daughter walking with her back against the wall, I don’t see a clean hallway anymore.
I see a little girl trying not to get things wrong.
And I recognize her.
She was me. In my business. For years.
Perfectionism told me that if I just got it right enough, it would be safe to be seen.
The truth is — you have to be seen first. And then you figure out what right looks like.
So if you’re sitting on a half-finished proposal, a website that’s “almost ready,” a service you haven’t launched yet — this is your sign.
Stop perfecting it. Start showing it.
The customer you’re supposed to help is waiting. And they don’t need perfect. They need you.
Ready to stop hiding behind “almost ready” and finally get in front of the right clients? That’s exactly what we work on together.
